


untitled, unfinished, undefined

by MattyWantsToBattle



Category: Bandom, Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Emotional/Psychological Abuse, First Meetings, Fluffy Ending, House of Heroes - Freeform, M/M, One Shot Collection, Panic Attacks, Pre-Band
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-06 11:45:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16387181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MattyWantsToBattle/pseuds/MattyWantsToBattle
Summary: Josh wasn't appreciated in his last band, and Tyler just lost his bandmates.Meeting each other might be the thing that helps them.A collection of loosely connected Joshler one shots.





	untitled, unfinished, undefined

**Author's Note:**

> Basically this is just a bunch of one shots that are loosely connected in the same universe.

Josh loved drumming.

There was just something about losing yourself in the movements, bouncing as you hit the membranophone with a stick to create beautiful noises.

He knew he wasn't the only one who could drum, but he was the only drummer who could produce the sounds he did.

He thought he was good at it too! Josh loved it, and he was in a band now so people could hear it. Except his band didn't really... Like him?

Josh didn't know what the problem was, honestly. He knew they yelled at him a lot for simple mistakes, stared at him and gestured at him whenever he made them live, cut off his microphone sometimes, took his microphone *fully* away other times. And even in that interview, it was so obvious he didn't matter.

No one talked to _him_ , and sure when he interjected a joke he got a laugh, but then it wasn't about him.

They even practically **said** he was just a replacement.

But Josh loved drumming.

Playing songs live at festivals or concerts was scary. Josh knew by now he wasn't the best, he was a quick replacement and nothing more.

He knew by now that his singing was awful, that he needed to just focus on his drumming because he needed to get _better_ at that.

All of that made playing live so horrible. He wanted to sing too.

He wanted to not be yelled at or stared at or threatened to be kicked out of the band.

The nickname wasn't exactly nice either.

It made him feel like he was the monster or bad guy, when he came into the room Tim would make those noises like he was an off brand shark from jaws.

But Josh shook those thoughts away.

Because Josh loved playing drums, and that's what he came to do, God damn it.

Josh lost himself in the movements, singing into the microphone when it was his turn to backup vocal (muted again. He expected as much. He couldn't sing for shit.), and cringing when he was off tempo for a couple seconds. He brought it back quickly however, and hoped no one really noticed. He'd gotten distracted by his own feelings of hurt, and now he fucked up.

Oh no, they were staring.

Colin would never be proud of him now. Josh had promised he would make sure the drums didn't fail while he was gone.

Josh felt like a liar.

Tim didn't seem to really say anything, just looking back at him before he went back to his guitar.

Jared had come over to gesture at him, give him a glare before he went back to playing himself.

Eric never took his eyes off Josh.

Josh felt like crying, but he merely continued the song.

When they were done, it was time for the next band to play.

Josh slowly got off the stage and moved backstage with the others.

"Jesus Josh, you really don't try, do you?"

Eric.

Josh gave a noise. "I do! I did!"

"Except you messed up again!"

Josh whimpered a bit as Eric yelled at him, looking away. Tears were welling in his eyes.

"I can't wait till Colin gets back." Jared mumbled.

Tim had been staring at Josh with an unreadable look, but spoke up once Jared did.

"He is back. Josh, you're out of the band."

Josh twitched. "... Wait, what?"

"Colin is back, we don’t need you anymore.” Tim spoke again, voice dark and heated.

Josh carefully rubbed his hands together, panic welling up.

He felt unneeded. He couldn’t sing. He was just the drummer; all he could ever be was a drummer. He wasn’t even good at that!

“Do you have a way home?” Tim asked, voice cold and unfeeling.

“I’ll find one.”

Josh wasn’t going to take handouts from them. Not after everything. He turned and started to grab his things, hands shaking as panic continued bumping in his throat and chest. He didn’t know what he was doing.

“We can give you a ride home at least.” Jared, trying to play nice, trying to... what? Save face?

Josh huffed shakily, clenching his fists to try and calm down his nerves. “No.”

Josh stormed out as best he could, before finally breaking down behind the venue and sobbing his heart out.

The drummer struggled for air, pounding his hand into the ground over and over as he laid on the floor.

He trembled violently, eyes squeezing shut. He needed to... Live after this.

Needed a job, needed to find some way to... Get his dreams to still happen.

It was a few weeks later that he started to work at Guitar Center.

He just went with the motions mostly, self esteem at an all time low.

His friend, Chris Salih, had decided to invite him to see his band play pretty quickly.

Josh didn't care that his life was moving so quick now, he just wanted to get away from the toxicity he had been in before.

He felt stupid for letting 8 months crack his self esteem.

Josh had decided to go.

Josh remembered watching from the crowd and feeling something. He had felt a lot, hearing... Tyler, was it? Tyler's voice.

Josh moved to the side to talk to Tyler after they were done.

"Hey, that was pretty sick."

Tyler had blinked at him in confusion, before giving a smile. "Sick?"

"Yeah. Awesome."

Tyler rubbed his arm and glanced away. "Uh- well, thanks...!"

They hit it off.

Josh was excited by Tyler's ideas, and saddened when Chris and the other band member, Nick, left.

Josh decided joining Tyler was a great idea.

His plans to go to Nashville to pursue his drumming was long forgotten. He wanted to work with Tyler.

The only problem was, he was worried he was just a replacement. Like always.

He didn't want to be a replacement again. He was SCARED of backing up vocals, of messing up, of speaking, of...

Tyler noticed his anxiety.

Maybe that was why he was so encouraging, so nice to him. Tyler believed in Josh.

And in turn, Josh believed in Tyler.

Tyler talked about him, included him, and maybe a handful of fans weren't all too sure why Josh was needed, but people did care about him.

On nights Tyler felt bad, or had dark thoughts, Josh was there to care for him. They had each other.

Josh thought maybe that was enough. 


End file.
